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Next weekend, my family and I are going to Boston for family weekend at BU, where my sister is starting her freshman year.� I told my mother that while I understood that the weekend will be primarily about my sister, I wanted to see a few friends of mine in the Boston area if there was time.� The list of friends Iapos;d like to see includes a friend from Muhlenberg (John), a friend from Israel (Noam), and a friend whom everyone thinks is my new love interest, but really isnapos;t (Adam), who actually isnapos;t Boston area, but will be in Boston for the weekend performing with the Coast Guard Academy Band.� Mom said okay, but admitted that scheduling might be difficult because our cousins might also come up to Boston the same weekend and they will want to see us too.� Fine.

I mentioned the band performance as a possible family activity.� As a "this is something to do but we donapos;t actually have to do it".� Not as a "I must see my apos;boyfriendapos; perform".

Mom decided it was worth mentioning to my sister that Adam is performing that weekend in Boston.� My sister sent me the following text message last night:

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hey so mom told me that adamapos;s band is in boston next weekend so you can totally stay over my room on sunday night if you want to see him

Whatapos;s wrong with this picture?


1) My family seems to think I have only one friend in Boston, which is simply not true.
2) For as long as I could remember, my family showed a stunning lack of interest in my love life.� I�LIKED that they showed no interest because I had no interest in telling them about it.� I had NO problem with the fact that they were so unaccomodating to my love interests.� It allowed me a certain amount of privacy.
3) I do not appreciate that they are switching gears and becoming all too accomodating all of a sudden.� It makes me suspicious.
4) They donapos;t even know Adam.� Mom, Steph, and Michael met him for all of five minutes waiting for an improv show to start.
5) I donapos;t even know how much I like Adam.� I have a lot of reservations about him myself.
6) Even if my family suddenly woke up with the idea that I must get married immediately (weapos;re Jewish, itapos;s not impossible), Adam is not a perfect match for me by any means.� He is much less religious than me.� He doesnapos;t keep Kosher.� He barely observed Rosh Hashanah.� Under ordinary circumstances, my family does not find this acceptable.
7) If the situation was reversed, and I was the one living in Boston and Stephanieapos;s "boyfriend" was going to be there for the weekend, I would most assuredly NOT return the favor, let alone offer it in the first place.� I cannot imagine a scenario in which I would feel enough goodwill towards Stephanie or Boyfriend to make an offer like that.� In fact, I can barely imagine feeling anything but hatred towards anyone involved romantically with my sister.
8) The fact that my family has this baseless adoration for Adam makes me like him less.� A lot less.
9) Why are my mom and my sister discussing my "love life" in the first place?� Imagine if Iapos;d actually confessed deep feelings about him to my mother.� Would she go tell my sister that too?

Rationally, I know this is not a big deal and I should be grateful that my family has some willingness to meet a pseudo-love interest of mine, as this is a brand new development.� Ha, maybe I should let them take Adam out to dinner after all, watch him order something unkosher, and start a conversation on the election or Israel or Judaism, and then maybe theyapos;ll stop liking him so much.

But I find myself getting irrationally angry over this.

Sorry, just needed to vent.

Obviously, I canapos;t tell Adam about this.� He would be overjoyed.� He would just love to have my family think that he and I are serious, the way his family thinks this, never mind that he and I arenapos;t even officially going out and even though I did nothing to give this impression to them.� In typical male fashion, Adam always tends to do very nice things that are exactly what I didnapos;t want at that moment.� It is maddening.

I find myself angry at everybody.� I am angry at my family for being this nice to Adam and not nice at all to Tom, even though they had no reason to be that way to either of them.� I am angry at Adam for not being able to read my mind and my soul.� I am angry with Adam everytime I realize that heapos;s only attracted to the physical.� I am angry at Tom for being so damn stubborn.� I am angry with my friends, especially my friends from Israel, for seeing Adam as perfect boyfriend material and being way too excited about it.

Most of all, I am angry with myself, because in spite of all of my radical theories on relationships, in spite of the fact that I think traditional relationships are worthless, in spite of the fact that I did everything possible to undermine its beginning (i.e. Stepping up my cheating and pot smoking activities), in spite of the fact that I know this is doomed for failure because our friendship was based just on physicality, I am on the verge of creating the most cliched relationship ever.� I am on the verge of becoming Coast Guard Girlfriend, an incredibly cliche position made worse by the fact that I donapos;t actually have a paying position at the moment.

I am angry, because I know it wonapos;t work and yet, I find myself falling for him anyway.� I havenapos;t fallen for him yet, but unfortunately, I could....

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